It happened again.  There I was, trying on clothes at the Nordstrom Rack, and I found myself in tears.  Now as somebody who has been overweight for as long as she can remember, this isn’t anything new.  Many times I found myself crying while trying on clothes, wondering why even the largest sizes wouldn’t fit.  I always knew I was on the larger side, but never thought of myself as so large I would have to shop at special stores.

Shopping for high school dances was always a nightmare.  The junior’s section would carry junior’s sizes and those would never work.  Although I am on the shorter side, the short dresses would always be so tight and so short that I never would have passed a fingertip test to get in to the dance.  As it was, one of my most embarrassing dance experiences was when a teacher called me out on my dress being too low-cut.  I never meant for that to happen, but it was what passed as fitting at the time.  Why would I have wanted to wear something like that anyway? Why would I want to feel uncomfortable for an entire night of dancing? To be like everyone else.  I was at a stage in my life where I was hell-bent on fitting in, no matter what that meant.

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